Thursday 31 July 2014

Going going

I'm grateful for eventually getting out of the house this morning. There were several attempts that failed for various reasons, including the one where I called a cab and they were too busy, so when I left late and hurrying and saw one pull up a few doors down to drop someone off I was very grateful that he was free and happy for a fare back down.

I was grateful that thus I got to acupuncture on time as Rachel is giving up her clinic in town here and it's the last treatment I'll have under these beautiful ceiling mouldings. I give thanks for all the wondrous things she's done for me over the years, including simply listening and making me the occasional cup of tea - what a treat that's been!


I'm grateful for walking up the hill, a little revived after today's session and finding a couple of rather readable looking paperbacks in the tubs outside the coastwatch tower for only 50p a piece... and for getting home just in time for a little light gymnastic watching on TV...

I'm grateful I imagined going out again this evening to watch the carnival procession...I can hear the bands and lorry horns but there's not a chance I could float down and see the floats. I give thanks in anticipation for someone filming it putting it on youtube later, along with the fireworks maybe, as I reckon I've just enough awakeness left to assemble and assimilate some tea and then I'll be fast asleep...

Wednesday 30 July 2014

Spend thrift

When I'm reminded of the limited time I might have to do the things I like, I tend to want to spend more time doing them rather than grumbling or worrying about it. I'm grateful for my sore bits allowing me some leeway in this today and I'm grateful for spending less money than I thought I would in several ways...

Having asked for a quote for a four night stay in a hotel I kind of thought when I asked for five nights it would be 25% more but it turned out to be less than 6% extra; then when I opened my laptop to start the quest for bargain train fares I found a page left open with a pair of shoes in a mail order basket that I'd decided to 'think about' as they were more than I wanted to spend and overnight they'd become half price! And then on top of that I managed to get the tickets I wanted for even less than I spent on the journey for which I'd had a full voucher refund earlier this year so that I still have a voucher left to spend...much gratitude for all of the above.

I'm grateful for more than just such material things though...when I was in the city for my scan last week I was struck by what a lovely feel there was to it these days. It's not the first time I've felt that - the first time I did I moved there - but the last few years it had seemed not to have the same mellowness which is why I'd moved back out. 


I give thanks for the prettiness and merriness and memories I found there today; for the talented buskers, shared laughter on the bus and interesting brickwork to look at while waiting, and for the way all kinds of folk gather around the cathedral on the green to eat their lunches on a sunny day.  For the sight of a thatcher thatching on a roof, and a combine harvester harvesting in a field just a few miles away on the way home.

Tuesday 29 July 2014

Thank you for the day

I was a bit of a weepy wimp in bed late last night but I found myself remembering all the laughter there'd been in the day and gave thanks for all the semi strangers who'd shared it with me. I give thanks for Jenny for reminding me of the nugget of yin in yang and vice versa, so that in the midst of any emotion there is always a little of its counterpart, and for Trish reminding me many hours of treatment means many books to read!

I give thanks for today being too hot not to go out for a while in between deliveries of essential medical supplies and a non-essential but nonetheless very welcome new toaster which a) matches my kettle and b) presumably has some kind of thermostatic control. The marks by the knob on my old one wiped off years ago and recently I've found no matter where you turn it it only does burnt! I've already been giving lots of thanks for the kettle which looks great and is easy to fill and empty even when my hands are being difficult, so I'm looking forward to breakfast tomorrow and finding the toaster just as good. 

I give thanks for a much needed nap this afternoon...

I give thanks for lace trimmed cropped leggings to pull on under a dress to combat summer evening chill, and for the just right plain grey cardigan I bought in New Look a while ago, that's waiting to have the buttons changed but which keeps getting worn in the meantime. It was only the proximity of New Look to the Citizens' Advice Bureau that made me look for something so unlikely to be found there so retrospective gratitude for finding it too...

I give thanks for pre cooked rice in a pouch. Years ago I used to cook rice perfectly in a handmade earthenware casserole in an ancient oil fired Rayburn but it's been downhill all the way since then...until now!

Monday 28 July 2014

Think tanker

I don't see so much of the sea when the trees are in full leaf but as long as there's a patch big enough for a moonbeam to land on or a boat to sail through that's good enough for me... Yesterday evening I was grateful to happen to spot a tanker lining up for the pilot to come and steer it into port. Then again later, just as I'd put my tea on the table, I thought to go back and see if it was still there, and it was just turning in towards shore to edge through the channel...so I picked up the binoculars I keep on the windowsill and saw something I never have before - a tanker heading in at just the same time so that they crossed beside each other in my little patch of sea! I give thanks for understanding you might think this is a sad thing to be happy about, but even more that I'm happy about it any way...

I give thanks that my pre-dialysis 'chat' is over and I can get back to being pre- and forget about dialysis again for a while. I'm grateful for not being talked down to and for hearing one or two things wouldn't quite as fearful as I feared. I'm grateful I've lots of experience already at facing mortality so that side of it is quite easy for me, and that I know life limiting illness is much easier from the practical point of view if you have loving friends and family around, so that I'm ready for the extra hardness that comes when you don't. I'm grateful for knowing I can just say 'no'.

I'm grateful the appointment overran so that I could run (metaphorically) straight to Knit and Natter to do just that (and that the cab driver managed to miss the moped rider who pulled out into the road without so much as a glance!) And I'm grateful that that overran too so there's little time between a hasty tea and going to choir to think about anything much at all. I give thanks for a suitably irrelevant and chirpy picture from the sculpture trail...




Sunday 27 July 2014

Cloud cover

Yesterday evening I gave thanks for relaxing with a film...this doesn't happen nearly as often as I'd like it to because I don't very often find films I want to watch, but if ever I come across any possibilities in the schedules I record them just in case and this one was right up my street - grisly murders, haunting scenery and a bit of good ol' Southern blues!

Afterwards I gave thanks getting my earplugs in nice and tight and sleeping quite soundly. This bit of nimble fingering doesn't happen as often as I'd like either but I've managed it two nights out of three now, and only dropped my medication twice so bedtimes have been quite restful by my standards...though I've still managed to burn myself on one each of the cooker, the iron and the sewing machine light bulb during the days in between (sigh!)

I give thanks for a cloudy Sunday afternoon...just made for TV and I'm grateful I've watched a bit while doing a bit of making! I'm grateful my wrists and thumbs have allowed a little knitting and crochet for the first time for a week or so. 

I'm grateful for staying indoors but for finding some entertainment in listening to a chap down the terrace holding forth long and loud about all manner of things. I know I shouldn't laugh but I can't help myself sometimes...I'm grateful I know better than to repeat anything he says that makes me chuckle, though, as that would be intentionally mean!

I'm grateful for knowing the Guardians of the Sea are down there looking after it until I can get back...




Saturday 26 July 2014

Top ten

Today I've been grateful for the hereness of here. The town is a bit too teeming for my tastes this time of year but Laura and I managed to find a little free table outside a cafe to make a few plans for our journey whilst having a cuppa and sharing an enormous bun and it even matched the ribbon I'd just sewn on my dress and I do like a bit of co-ordination!

Afterwards I gave thanks for the guitar music from the busker on the triangle and the friendly service in the shops I needed to go into but most of all that, despite the annual rumours that each one is the last, our sculpture trail is back. This year it's particularly welcome not just because it's the tenth and has a special 'cake'...


...but also because the raised beds where they set up the artwork were demolished in the February storms and the seafront strewn with chunks of broken brick and paving, so to see them spruce and planted and with all the clever sculptures again was such a delight. 

I was grateful for a nap when I got home, and for a shower - outside, not inside on me! I love the smell on the first rain when it's been warm and dry...

And finally (phew!) I'm grateful I've ironed my sheets and pillowcases and for an action packed quali to entertain me while I did. I'm also grateful I've something planned for tea that shouldn't take too long to make but I must hurry away and do so before I'm tempted to doze again. 10-10 as they say...

Friday 25 July 2014

That's entertainment!

My 'to do' list for today was pretty unrealistic, let alone the 'would like to' one, but actually I'm quite grateful for that as a realistic agenda might look a bit short and sad. I give thanks for entertaining all sorts of ideas of activities I might join in locally and domestic ambitions achieved because I like the idea that I still envisage myself as capable, even when I prove not to be. I'm sure it helps slow the shrinking of comfort zones, something that's rather important to me.

I give thanks for taking pleasure in cleaning the brown off the inside of mugs from tea, and from inside the bin cupboard door where tea bags have missed it. I give thanks for photos on Facebook of dolphins in the Bay here and orca in the Biscay one and for remembering the sandeel seller sunbathing on the back beach the other day lying back on a square crab trap with his yellow wellies on. It would have made a great photo but I think it's rude to snap people unawares for the purposes of entertainment...

I give thanks for having a few minutes' play at revamping a dress bought in a cheapy shop in a pretty fabric and horribly frumpy style, but most of all for getting down to the hard work of changing my old router for a second hand experimental replacement. I reckoned it was worth throwing a fiver plus p&p at a long standing internet problem I feared needed far more spent on it than that. Technically it wasn't hard work of course, but physically moving furniture and grovelling on my knees to squeeze in and get at the sockets, plus all the wrist wrenching knuckle grinding handling of plugs and wires was very much so. The effort proved worth every ouch though, as it was every penny, and I'm exceedingly grateful for that!

Thursday 24 July 2014

Walking on eggshell

I was very grateful for a cloudy start to the day as I took a long time to get started myself and there were a few things to be done indoors before I could leave - including lot of rest in between each task. There's a reason I don't go out every day, unless I'm away from home and everything else is being done for me, and it becomes very clear if I break that rule why I try not to... I gave thanks that one of the tasks was arranging somewhere to stay as I've the chance of a lift up northish for a couple of days

I'm grateful I know not to put on what I plan to wear for the day until I've eaten my breakfast or I'll end up wearing my breakfast! There's a reason I tend to choose prints - it's not just because I like the patterns and colours, the camouflage is handy too.

I'm grateful the duck egg blue of my new bathroom mats matches the walls in there so well and the green of my new kettle matches the kitchen worktops. I'm grateful for hastily rustling up some blueberry buns to share with Rachel even though I forgot to take them with me! And for the gift of some 'recycled' flowers...


I'm grateful for watching some of the Commonwealth Games opening ceremony. I'm always up for a bit of collective effervescence, even via a TV, and it was particularly nice to hear two of my all time favourite tunes 'Bonnie banks of Loch Lomond' and Movin' On Up. They're not often on the same playlist for some reason...

Wednesday 23 July 2014

Amazing space

I give thanks for a zombie evening, and dozy start to the day. It's being rather a demanding week and only half way through! I give thanks my toenails needed repainting, that's always an excuse for a bit of a sit still...

I give thanks for finally getting through to someone who could confirm my scan appointment was today even though the confirmation letter had still not arrived when I went to the Post Office yesterday, and for finally decided on the best way to get to it (well, second best after someone nice taking you in a car and saying 'Is there anywhere else you'd like to go while we're in the area?). I know I could go door to door with the patient transport service but I always want to go somewhere else while I'm in the area and, though I'm not at all adverse to chatting to chance met strangers along the way, I'd rather not be trapped in the company of someone who thinks they are being kind to those less fortunate than themselves or who is lonely and needs to talk. (The last sentence reads both ways deliberately!)

I'm grateful for the chance to escape angle grinders down the terrace and a very howly dog, to deliver a couple of items to the new food bank collection point at the station cafe and admire the new paintwork on the wrought iron there. I give thanks for seeing how the trackside repairs are going, and the all glorious countryside round about. Much gratitude for the sight of little Red Rock Cafe open, accessible and busy again, a long skein of geese over the estuary and Clive and Sally waiting for me on the green...


I give thanks for the city being relatively empty due to the heat so that grabbing the bargains I'd hoped to was much easier than I'd thought it would be. I'm grateful that though they felt like bricks when I was carrying them up from the bus stop they were actually rather nicer. I give thanks for finishing off my new dress and for a couple more episodes of the amazing Amazing Spaces to catch up with as I zombie out some more with my tea. 

I give thanks for a new lock on the communal door! This was requested within seven days on the Preliminary Notice sent less than a week ago, quite reasonably and legally...but one is not used to a reasonable and legal response. Watch this one...

Tuesday 22 July 2014

Tea and toast

I'm grateful I went to choir last night. When everything you do is physically challenging it's important, I believe, to same some of whatever little oomph you have for some challenges that bring psychological benefit. Much gratitude as ever for the privilege of singing in harmony with a bunch of rather harmonious folk...for being outdoors within sight of the sea on a balmy summer's evening, and for the sound of a young band practising in the club above the loos in the carpark just a few yards away from where we are in the summer house. I love knowing that other groups of like minded souls are getting together to make the music they've a mind to...

I started today fit only for tea and toast and lying reading in bed, so I'm grateful I had tea and milk and bread and a bed and a book! I also got round to ordering a new kettle and toaster both having been on the 'things to replace before they get any worse' list for many months. The kettle's already blown a fuse in the plug and I'm beginning to worry that it might blow me up too, but you know, getting a new one is one of those tasks you only remember you wish you'd already done at completely the wrong moment to do it, so I'm grateful they're on their way at last. And during the search for appropriate items I came across a small travel kettle in a sale (something I only remember I'd like to have when I'm somewhere I'd like to use it!) so much gratitude for that as well.

This afternoon I've been grateful I twigged that if I put some leftovers in a plastic box, and my book and a towel in a rucksack I could get a cab and go and toast myself lying down reading on the back beach. Ah, the joys of living somewhere there are several sandy options and at least one is rarely taken by tourists at all!


I'm grateful for almost finishing a little 'tea dress' from a couple of metres of £2.99 fabric from ebay. It was listed as 'cotton lorne' but I didn't let the spelling mistake rankle me enough not to snap up such a bargain!

Monday 21 July 2014

Holiday home

I give thanks for sleeping well, and waking late and still having time for a long lie in!

For feeling hot, hot, hot... and for having a shower to get clean and cool again

For the warm compress effect on aches and pains - it doesn't diminish them but they do feel soothed

For living somewhere I'd probably go on holiday to if I didn't...

For the security guards at the sea wall workings jokingly helping keep seagulls off peoples' ice cream in their quieter times...

For thinking I'd treat myself to one of the enormous ones from Eastcliff, seeing smaller ones being handed to customers in the queue ahead of me and telling myself not to be piggy...and then getting an enormous one myself!

For a nice natter at the knitting group and a lift home to collapse in a nap.

For being almost ready to go to choir, and determined to go even though another nap does seem rather appealing

Sunday 20 July 2014

Thumbs up

I give thanks for the absurd amount of pain I've been in again today because... well, you might as well be grateful as grumbling doesn't help! It's in my joints and muscles and tendons so I'm grateful I know it's nothing serious, just the usual things just being unusually insistent, and worst of all in my hands and wrists so it makes me aware of what useful appendages they are. I give particular thanks for opposable thumbs! Despite considerable opposition, mine have been performing those myriad little tasks we so easily take for granted such as squeezing toothpaste, turning taps and tops of bottles and jars, pulling up underwear and holding cutlery or a cup, albeit stiffly and creakily and with much squeaking and groaning from me.

I give thanks that pain can give you the opportunity to be more mindful and aware of your body and its processes and parts. And I give thanks for distractions including noisy couple of days in the neighbourhood with bikes revving, dogs barking, children screeching, gulls squealing, an argument over strimmers this afternoon and squawking women at a party across the road last night. Oh, and briefly this afternoon the drummer boy! I haven't heard him for ages and thought he might have moved but maybe he just went to Uni and is back to entertain us again.. I would be grateful for that, and it does sound like he needs some practice...

I'm grateful for getting a bit of sewing done - the pinning's hard but my knees aren't too bad today so the pedalling's OK. And a bit of cooking, including Potatoes Dauphinoise which are very decadent on a hyperkalemic diet but I boiled the spuds to within an inch of their lives in the largest pan of water, as well as the accompanying veg, so it's as saintly as a sin can be.

Saturday 19 July 2014

Saturday light's all right

I give thanks for the soft glow of late Saturday morning light on the sea which always fills me with awe. I don't think there's any particular meteorological reason why the clouds do what they do on that particular day of the week, and it's just because it's usually the only time I'm near the sea at that particular time of day, so if they're doing it I'll see it. I give thanks that this is a bonus of still having to collect my mail from the Post Office because we still have no way of shutting, let alone locking, the communal door where the letter box is.

I give thanks that though, as usual, I've failed to capture the transluscence there's some pleasing shapes in this attempt...


I give thanks that it was no special hardship to be up early today as after the lightning the sky was lightening and I couldn't get back to sleep. I give thanks for arranging to meet Jenny so we could share a cab up the hill, and she was grateful too, not least because the rain started again just as we arrived at the rank! I give thanks for a spare pair of hands to make light work of some cleaning and to help with tasks where four are better than two...

I give thanks for solving the first world problem of the new TV that doesn't hide as much stuff behind it as the old one did. After considering several solutions that involved money, strength and skills not at my disposal I decided the easiest thing would be if I found a just the right size and shape plastic storage box in town here (ie. not a size and shape I'd ever seen before), top it with a just the right size and weight piece of previously painted MDF from one of my 'sheds' and then cover it with an equally appropriately dimensioned and also harmoniously colour co-ordinated piece of textile from one of my not sheds.  This wasn't quite as simple as I'd hoped it might be...it was actually mostly much simpler, so a great deal of gratitude for that! It was hard on some currently very ouchy muscles and joints though, and I'm grateful I managed to also pick up exactly the kind of novel I thought I fancied reading (in the first secondhand shop I looked in of course, on the first shelf) so that this afternoon I could pretend I was going to lie down and start it...and have a nap instead.

I give thanks for the coincidence of a letter crossing in the post from Kostas...and telling me his TV just died! And that one of my cousin's photos has been included on the Tumblr cover pages. A relatively talented bunch we are...

Friday 18 July 2014

Beswitched

Yay, I managed to change the bathroom light bulb at the first attempt! It involves a tall ladder, an uneven floor, a fiddly fitting, fumbly hands and wobbly legs and it's very rare for all parts to be co-operative at once...

I give thanks you can still buy old fashioned recklessly energy wasting light bulbs.  I'm all for being green in as many ways as possible but there are one or two places in a home you need strong lighting as soon as you flick a switch not a few minutes later and for me, a bathroom's one of them!

I'm grateful that my new TV is 'A' rated for energy efficiency (see - I told you so!) and for for the delightfully old fashioned level of service from HBH Woolacotts. They're so good they even get a name drop...If you live in Devon or Cornwall, need a new appliance and don't have someone both strong and technically capable at your unpaid beck and call, give them one instead! I'm also grateful for the quality of the product as well, you understand, good sound, awesome picture and so light in weight and manoeuvrable (yes - I looked up the spelling, and yes - it does look wrong!) but though the screen's the same size as the old one the surround's much smaller and I'm going to have to store a lot less untidiness behind it in future...

I give thanks for a bit of a bond with the delivery driver/installer too as, being the better sort of player, he spotted my forty three year old guitar on the wall and wanted to know more. I don't mind so much only being able to 'play anything you like as long as it's all in C' if I can say it to someone and they know what I mean... And I give thanks that just after writing that I saw Bob share a picture on Facebook of a poster for the Tramlines festival with his name on. It's a big line up and covers lots of venues but to see his name on the same poster as Sister Sledge has made me all emotional. We ARE family you know!

Thursday 17 July 2014

You wouldn't think, would you?

...that the storm damage from early in the year is still very much in evidence around and about but I've zoomed in past the lined up plant and vehicles beside the cafe on the sea wall where work is still ongoing, and the soft focus in the middle distance almost hides the fact the pier is still patched up...but hey, I give thanks for the astonishing blueness of it all today and for finding a complete section of sea front all renewed with not a cordon or pile of debris or stretch of plastic tape in sight.


I give thanks I've finished and posted my paperwork and can chill...everything else has been secondary to that the last few days and though I don't know what will happen next at least I've done what I can for now...

I give thanks for this thought provoking article about how bereavement affected someone who was blind. That's something, on the whole, most of us wouldn't think about either and that's why I enjoy reading 'ouch'  
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-ouch-28290916

That was spotted earlier...since then I've been giving thanks for my first acupuncture treatment for a couple of weeks which, combined with the end of term feeling from the previous paragraph, means I am delightfully beyond both coherent thought and cohesive activity and have descended into enjoying less edifying internet offerings such as these compilations below for which I'm grateful too...
http://thecrazyrussians.com/2012/08/a-compilation-of-the-100-craziest-russian-photos-on-the-planet/

http://izismile.com/2011/04/16/only_in_america_scenes_prove_unique_and_disturbing_52_pics.html

Wednesday 16 July 2014

Breeze blocks

I'm grateful I've stopped slaving over a hot laptop, whether it turns out to be for a tea break or, as I suspect it might, drifts into an early night... I'm doing well, I'm nearly there, but I reached the point when I could do no more...

I'm grateful I'm beginning to remember bits of the day when I wasn't staring at the screen - little slivers of time when I wasn't 'do it yourself soliciting' (as I called it earlier but which doesn't seem quite the right expression somehow) and grabbed a bite to eat or got on with household chores... Oh yes, and I'm grateful I've ordered my new TV!

I'm grateful for doing some seated tai chi to stretch out my cramped muscles and mind a little...

I'm grateful glipsing the evening race of white sails scudding across the bay in the fresh breeze

And I'm grateful for spotting this fine collection of images, some of which I don't remember seeing before
http://twistedsifter.com/2014/07/the-ultimate-banksy-gallery/

Tuesday 15 July 2014

Right click

Wow! I give thanks for all the new skills I'm learning in preparing the virtual paperwork so that if it has to be printed it'll look all professional and posh. Well, more so than I knew how a few days ago anyway. Most girls reading this will understand the bright smile with which I failed to find a suitable empty file anywhere to put some of the first efforts in, and the grateful imagining of an excuse to buy new stationery popped into my head!

I give thanks for a benefit of dodgy internet coverage...if you're working on your laptop and don't need to be online you can go somewhere you can't be and not be distracted by 'just checking your emails' or any other procrastination...

On the other hand, while away from the unconnected office that is the kitchen, I gave thanks for a Facebook friend posting a photo of a beach near here that made me decide to go down to the recycling bins and see if it was irresistibly warm enough to take a little stroll in the sun. I couldn't go far but gave thanks that you don't have to go far from here to see the moor and more sea, glowing agapanthus and a shy wren popping out of a bush for some sun... Also for seeing another post on return that led to passing on news of a job going that sounded just right for someone currently not online at all at home..

There is sooo much going on at the moment that I completely forgot in my mini break down the hill to actually use the camera I'd remembered to grab before I left with the very intention of taking a photo for this post. So instead you have the opportunity to snigger at this image of synchronised nearly dolphins from last week. Be grateful...be very grateful indeed!



Monday 14 July 2014

Writing on the wall

Phew! I'm grateful I'm home, though a little disappointed I appear to have run out of steam to go to choir. Never mind, it's only half singing and half AGM tonight. I'm grateful to my body for telling me what to do - I'd intended just to slip out of my tidy trousers before having a little pre-dinner lie down and I seem to have inadvertently slipped into nightie and dressing gown!

I'm grateful to Bev for her assistance this afternoon, and her reassurance. When you're trying to make sense of difficult situations on your own it's helpful sometimes to have someone to double check the location of both the wood and the trees. I am now armed with the ammunition for the first part of legal proceedings which will hopefully, eventually, change my life for the better and have earmarked tomorrow for another assault on documentation. Fighting talk indeed, ha ha! I'm grateful the writing's on the wall though not as stunningly as in that Spanish city I may have mentioned I visited not long ago :-)


I'm grateful for the air of relief and optimism that must have been emanating from me afterwards as there seemed to be shared smiles and chuckles and conversations wherever I went. Much thanks to the lovely folk at the bus stops and on the buses, and in the shops and cafes. For seeing the horses and jockeys parading in the paddock before the next race as we passed the course, and a shopkeeper catching up with a customer who'd left something behind. For the grey light on the estuary, and the mirrory mud with the tide far out, for a bank of buddleia and a buttercup lawn. For a group of young schoolboys bonding around the scooters a couple of them had and an even smaller one feeding stamped envelopes into a postbox while his owner waited beside him a car...

Oh and I'm grateful I've decided that when I've posted this I'm going to order that TV...life without the box AND the chocolate is just too stressful!

Sunday 13 July 2014

Savouring grace

This morning it was really hard to motivating myself to get out of bed, so I was very grateful when I remembered I'd promised myself a peach. Fresh fruit is rationed now but the good thing about this is that you learn not to gobble the goodies but to savour each mouthful as long as you can. Similarly, the people who used to be surprised at how long I could make a box of chocolates last would be downright flabbergasted by how slowly I can eat a single one now! I'm grateful for the benefits to the mind and soul this controlling of desires may bring even if the flesh still gets a bit angsty about it sometimes.

It's been a long old haul at the office today, my laptop clearly feeling the strain as much as I, refusing to pick up the scissors and glue, recognise and attach documents just written and so on, but finally I think I'm ready for my appointment at the CAB tomorrow, I'm very grateful to say. I'm hoping it'll let me watch an episode of Catfish when I've finished this and rustled up something vaguely tempting to eat avoiding pretty much all the tempting foodstuffs I can think of... I was extremely grateful last night to track down and finish watching the episode of First Dates I was enjoying when the TV packed up the other day. Much gratitude for programmers coming up with shows about human interaction so I can get the gist of what it is I've missed in life, as well as in the schedules.

I've just realised how quiet all the neighbours must have been while I was bustling about with electronic paperwork... so lots of thanks for that as well.

I give thanks for homing in on the source of the light aircraft engine sound and watching the tiny spot meandering through the sky...
I give thanks for homing in on the source of the frantic buzzing by the window - and letting it out!
I give thanks for the sound of the steam train whistle as it chugs through the town and for thinking of all those happy bods with their cameras or children maybe...

Saturday 12 July 2014

Staying connected

Today I've been a lot more un- than grateful I'm ashamed to say, so I give thanks as ever at times like this for the commitment I've made to going beyond the grumbles...

I'm grateful I have somewhere to live, that I have food to eat and light and heat, running water, a bath and a loo.  I give thanks for furniture and furnishings, equipment, utensils and supplies, for books to read and clothes to wear.

I give thanks that I can walk, and talk and write, that I can make myself understood.

I give thanks for joss sticks to cover up unpleasant neighbourhood smells, and headphones to cut down unpleasant noise.

I give thanks for pretty music wafting up from some festivities in town, for not quite burning my tea and for making some old glassware sparkle again with vinegar and baking soda.

I give thanks that my internet works most of the time and during one of those times I bought a different newer hub from ebay to try to see if it will work better. I'm grateful for various catch up TV services and a tablet that let's me  watch some of them lying down. And that the connection is better in the bedroom at the moment so that quite soon I might just go back to bed...

Friday 11 July 2014

Weight and see

I'm grateful for pretty much totally forgetting how exhausting every day life can be! There was me, dreading all the big heavy duty things I had to deal with when I got back, but completely ignoring the weight of the daily duties left behind as I lazily toasted my toes...


As always, I'd also totally forgotten how glorious the scenery is around here though, and how beautiful my flat is inside, so much gratitude for the rediscovery of those too...

I give thanks for a kind semi local man re dialling the cab company he had just called for a pick up from the port and handing me his phone to book one for myself. And for arriving at the station in time for a quick cuppa before the through train home...

I give thanks that the door is still not fixed and my post still being held at the Post Office as, until I could get my proverbial down there this afternoon, there was an extended (and appreciated) lull in some aspects of life admin...

And I give thanks I know it's sad to miss slobbing out in front of the TV even though I'm grateful I think I've found a way to get a new one!

Thursday 10 July 2014

Looking away

I give thanks for the cool greyness of the day today as there are parts of me that saw the sun for the first time this year yesterday and they'd rather not again so soon! Also because I decided last night, feeling the greyness of the prospect of return beginning to descend on my spirits, to write my blog earlier than usual while the gratitude were fresh in my mind.

I'm grateful for seeing unbroken expanses of sea and sky, the changing patterns of clouds and the surface of the water... For being awake for the passage through the unspellable isles this time (if you know the journey you'll know where I mean!)

... for the expectation on faces arriving and leaving the ship (and concentration of car drivers in foreign lands!) for sometimes managing to hear of the adventures they're on and not feel envy...

... for watching young couples carefully tending to their young children, the old affection between older ones; folk enabling those less physically fortunate, gaggles of friends and joyous dockside family reunions. If you are mostly preferred by others to be elsewhere you can forget it's not the norm, and that there's all those warm bonds of companionship to appreciate on other people's behalf. I also give thanks for the all the glimpses of relationships I'm very glad I'm not part of!

... for the snatches of conversation and inclusion I have from the occasional passengers who pause, and the friendly Orca team...

...for not having to shop and cook and do household chores, nor deal with hard days at the office of my life..

... for organising what to bring with me quite well: special thanks to little bags of Cheerios and little cartons of rice milk,  a travel mug to take my tea outdoors, a j-cloth moistened with washing up liquid to wipe up and part of a waterproof picnic blanket to sit on wet seats. The last one and I parted company at some point - I probably wandered off and forgot it, or thought I'd put it in my bag and missed. That's one of the downsides of travelling alone, not having anyone literally look out for you.

... for forgetting my cash card so that I wasn't tempted to treat myself unduly well... I have to treat myself to a new TV when I get back and that will be shock enough to the financial system.

...and for managing not to think about all the difficult things that haven't gone away just because I did

Wednesday 9 July 2014

Hasta la vista

I was grateful for the effects of avoiding steps and stairs as much as possible yesterday ie. not having to share my dreams with joint pain. I'm grateful for the cunning way my mind incorporates it into the story line line rather than waking me up, of course, but it still does limit the story line! I was grateful for a lovely sleep before I got into bed with a quick stroll to see the moon shining a pathway on the sea between that and actually settling in  and early this morning another one just to check we weren't surrounded my cetaceans (we weren't). That's one of the reasons a trip like this suits me so well... It's all so accessible and you can just pop your coat on over your nightie and no one will know!

I give thanks for all the folk working behind the scenes to keep the ship ship shape in all the ways we hardly even realise we expect - there's been a chap down a hatch most of the day,  this morning with spanners and hammers and so on, and this afternoon he was welding! We weren't noticeably taking in water but sunshine in whatever fullnesses sunshine comes in, so that it's been like a day at the beach without sand and gulls or a day round the pool only with everyone facing out not in. I'm grateful for the changing mix of folk passing through each day, just travelling together for a brief passage and for glimpsing this time in their lives.

I give thanks for being in beautiful Santander again, finding some new spots to appreciate and wishing, as usual, I could stay a little longer.  It's rather sad to be on the last leg of my curious journey now but I've greatly enjoyed the first three and, if I'm still as mobile next year (and still without a mobile home and chauffeur!) I'd be happy to do it all again...

Tuesday 8 July 2014

Just Wight

Yesterday evening I was so sleepy going back to the cabin to drop off things before dinner turned into an early night... With a long lie in to follow. I'm grateful for catching a stunning synchronised dolphin leaping display beforehand, and that I can't upload the photos as I've still got to master the magic necessary to know in advance when to click the shutter - waiting til they appear is too late!

It was very rocky going to sleep, so much so that I thought we'd stopped when I woke and it was so calm. I give thanks for finding a quiet sunny spot out of the wind and having the nous to fetch a chair before anyone else did. It was in the stern outside the fancy pants restaurant so I guess they wanted to discourage steerage classes from spoiling the view but as no meals were being served and the fancy pants diners mostly have their own balconies anyway I couldn't see the harm. I give thanks for the couple who were clearly coveting my seat but, on hearing I'd shortly be leaving to get sun lotion and were welcome, offered to save it for me in return for the info that stacks of the things were available on the decks where commoners congregate.

I was grateful we were for several hours in that frustratingly bright sunshine you see over the sea on a murky day inland, but as we were in the channel it was too dirty and busy for dolphins though I gave thanks for a skein of white seabirds trailing behind one another like the tail of a kite.  Plenty for a commercial shipping fan to be grateful for too, plus beautiful coastline I couldn't identify but have just realised on seeing it again, is the Isle of Wight!

I'm grateful I thought to order a pizza large enough for tea, supper and probably elevenses too, just in time before the  on board cafe shut. Each leg of the journey has a mostly different travelling contingent and this one seems to be particularly fond of smoking, drinking and shouting... Methinks another early night with my great book and some downloaded 'TV' could be just the thing!

Monday 7 July 2014

La lengua de mi corazon

I give thanks for hearing Castellano... Even before I got to the ferry funnily enough as the new album I downloaded was by a Spanish/English duo. I can only remember a dozen or so words and phrases myself now but you can always understand a bit more than you can say, can't you? Lovely too to listen to the effortless switches of a young couple bringing up their small boy bilingual.

I give thanks for finding a super viewing spot to sit indoors up in the bows but away from the bustle, eminently suitable but technically just a window sill halfway up the stairs so easily missed on previous embarkations . For seeing folk sleeping on the soft benches of the closed cafe early this morning, or rather not seeing them at first as it's a remarkably private place to lie, tucked in behind a table and far more comfy than a reclining seat as I discovered for myself in my backpacking days.

For being rocked to sleep in my cabin now I have less agility but slightly more ability to pay. For still knowing how to budget and for the city bus station cafe still doing a stonking tortilla baguette.  It's been etched in my memory as a great cheap munch but I'd forgotten quite how delicious they taste too!

For pods of dolphins and porpoises playing outside the window as I ate a delicious raspberry tart and congenial human company as and when... One I could even act normal with, normal to me you understand, not the normal I try normally try to act around other people - rare treat!

Sunday 6 July 2014

Life savers

Gee, I'm grateful I'm having a few days off as getting them organised has been exhausting let alone getting to the start of them! I'm grateful that despite a missing taxi and a late train causing a missed connection, I arrived here in time to sail... I'm grateful all (budget class) rooms are the same so it feels very homely after a few trips and you know where everything is.  Well... kind of! I'm grateful I brought a big picnic as I realised when unpacking that I left my cash card behind...

I'm grateful the tennis is on and that I'm not that bothered who wins. There's some folk around me must have bet their life savings on Federer the way they're carrying on! And I'm grateful there's a time out to write this the gently rocking boat is sending me to sleep as usual...

Saturday 5 July 2014

Technological advances

Time was if my TV stopped working I'd get out a screwdriver and my collection of valves. And there've been times when a man from Radio Rentals would come and sort it out or swap it, a friend with a car would help me get a new one and/or get rid of the old...and I give thanks for all these memories. There have also been periods in my life when I've been quite happy not to have a TV at all and I'm not sure if I'm moving into one of those or not, and I'm quite grateful for that too as I now have one that doesn't work so I can try it out. They can seem like company when you're stuck at home alone but they're not, and you can end up watching a  lot of drivel which probably doesn't make you feel any better at all...

Although I miss the self help of valve days, I give thanks for all the little miracles of the times we live in now... So I want to hear some new music and I don't have to wait for someone else to play it within earshot first, so I find something I like and can make a whole album appear on my lap in a minute or two by copying numbers from a piece of plastic. It doesn't matter that the price is in another currency or that I then want the music to fit in my pocket I can do that too just tapping here and there on more bits of plastic. Actually I learned a new skill in the process, nothing very taxing, just 'extracting files' though I didn't know that was what I wanted to do or what it was called and just did my usual 'Hmm, I wonder what happens when I click on this?' trick when I couldn't transfer them without. I'm very grateful the same spirit with which I opened up the back of old TVs is alive and well and helping me with more modern technology!

I give thanks for a curious period of total silence late yesterday evening when nothing stirred in the neighbourhood, not a breeze nor a shower, no dogs, nor birds nor humans or cars...even my tinnitus was quiet! Almost eerie it was, and I wondered if I'd had my earplugs in but I hadn't. On the other hand this afternoon there's been all kinds of aural intrusions including some kind of heavy plant behind the trees (mechanical - not a big bush!) and someone mowing the lawn so I was actually quite grateful to watch something on my tablet with my headphones on.

I give thanks for having to go out for some bits and bobs earlier because here is such a lovely friendly chatty place to be...and I also managed to get a remarkably straight and centred snap of the bright clouds and glowing grey of the sea - considering I could see nothing through the view finder at all! I give thanks for thinking I'm so nearly ready to go tomorrow, that when it's time to go I might be!


Friday 4 July 2014

It's good but it's not right

I give thanks that they brought back Catchphrase - it's so silly and pointless and makes me laugh so much!

I give thanks for a fairly successful morning making the Health Service work. We are so lucky we have one and I'm so grateful I'm still capable of spending chunks of my day on the phone and writing emails to get the best from it. Particular thanks to my rather droll GP and a very attentive dietician. Finding ways to reduce your potassium intake isn't actually hard at all...basically you just need to cut out food and beverages. Beyond that it gets a little tricky especially for anyone who's always eaten in what seemed to be a pretty healthy way. I'm very grateful they've decided I don't need any more bloods done for several weeks anyway... I must fit in as much gallivanting as I can while they're not looking and before they change their mind!

I'm grateful for trying out an idea I had to make Angel Delight with rice milk and cream (trying to cut down on milk and yoghurt) It didn't work but it was worth a go...

I'm grateful I've taken the time to do a trial sew up of my new jumper as I suspected the sleeves weren't turning out right and now I can see they're not. This is great as I now feel let off the hook trying to finish before I pack. It feels as if some more rest is more necessary right now - not even the thought of seeing the choir perform can tempt me off the sofa tonight, though I guess making tea and washing up and vacuuming might eventually... 

Anyway, I'm grateful I can also see it's going to be really lovely when it's sorted so well worth unpicking a bit and redoing. Heavens - I could even take some knitting with me to do while I'm away. Knitting and reading and looking at the sea and no housework and cooking and life admin sounds just what I need for a few days...I have a cardi I'm happy to take to wear instead but it didn't do up - does now!


Thursday 3 July 2014

Depths

Mmm, I give thanks for the awesomeness of warm! Not often it's toasty enough to get right through to my bones and it can make it easier to move around when I'm outside...though the more I do the more I'm likely to seize up back home again. I'm grateful for the water heating for a wallow...

I give thanks for the deep blue of the sea today, even when I took my sunglasses off! And for having less clothes on than usual so that Rachel could reach some different points.

It used to be small print was for the bad stuff, but on line these days you have to peer at it to spot gems like 'skip for now', 'revert to classic' and 'no thanks, I don't want your pesky app'! I'm grateful for steering my way through much of this kind of frustration yesterday evening before finally managing to download some music to put on my new Walkman. I give thanks for the richness of the bass... and the fact that this one has a clip so might be less inclined to meet the same fate it's predecessor did.

Wednesday 2 July 2014

Shallows

I'm grateful for a sunny day, for locals and tourists alike...for the sea quite flat, but waving a little near the shore so folk could be splashing and swimming not drowning. I give thanks for sitting and looking and trying not to think, whilst munching a little more than lip service renal lunch. I'm hoping if I just try to go gently at first it won't seem so hard when it's harder...and I give thanks that no one wants to take me out to dinner or make my tea which would make it harder for them.


I'm grateful for new smellies and sparklies and fabric to sew, some of them coming by post and counterbalancing a wadge of deeper stuff to deal with. I give thanks I can still find pleasure in fragrant baths and pretty things as other options narrow.

I'm grateful for catching a bit of tennis. I've only been to Wimbledon twice - the first time I saw Dimitrov win the boys' and the second I saw Murray win the mens', so there was a memory sense that game might be more of a dead heat. I was sorry to see Andy and his supporters looking so sad, and saddened too by the way anyone not directly involved has to feel it matters. I love a good match and would rather not see anyone badly beaten, but it is only a game you know! Personally I'd prefer it if no one I personally might want to win was in the final this year as I'm not going to be either there or here so, don't tell anyone, but secretly I'm a little bit grateful!

Tuesday 1 July 2014

Back to front

Mmm...I give thanks for the cool greyness this morning. All that sunshine yesterday led to far too much wandering about and much creaking and groaning today. I give thanks for the east wind blowing the leaves in a different direction so I get a different view, and for socks to warm my chilly feet. I give thanks for the wafts of blossom scent from a garden below, and a waft of some warbling bird's morning call I didn't recognise but which was remarkable, not only because it managed to get a song in edgeways between the loud mouthed crows and pigeons and gulls, but also because it sounded rather like a curlew. Curlews! There I go again, eyes filling up with memories of winding down from magnificent mountain tramps (and squinting up into the sun to spot the trilling lark!) An earful of hiraeth if ever there was one is a curlew's call...But, even though there's been a bit of rain recently and the grass needs cutting, one would have to be pretty confused to land in the shrubbery here. Though we did have a blundering pheasant once...Must have been a blackbird with a sore throat I reckon.

I give thanks for all my immediate neighbours being out at the same time so I could have a good old sing myself!

I'm grateful for another page of pre-legal paperwork done pertaining to the outstanding repairs. On the other hand, also for a Tesco delivery driver realising he didn't have to phone and wait outside a broken door for me to come down and let him in. He was also grateful I only had a small order today as his van was blocked by scaffolding truck further and he had to carry the boxes up the terrace...

And I'm grateful for a bit more knitting and crochet completed...


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