Fit

Happy Friday to everyone with plans for the weekend! I'm racking my brains for something a solitary slow person could do that wouldn't make them feel more solitary or slow surrounded by the bustle of lively lives. I'm so grateful my friends are so happy with what's going on for them right now and that they don't have anything troubling them to come and run by my willing ears...but I'd be willing if they'd just come by...or just to answer a message now and then if they had time to send one!

I'm grateful that if some unexpected invitation came along I wouldn't have to say 'I haven't a thing to wear' as I'm making progress with the dressmaking...though I've not actually made a dress recently but I have just completed another pair of linen trousers! It all takes much longer than I'd like as I've never enough energy and some tasks are just hard for my hands to do nowadays but it's pleasurable to do if I'm not too tired and I'm pleased with the results so thanks for both of those. Also that some very reasonably priced lace I found in town here was fitter for the intended purpose that the expensive one I bought on line which is very pretty but wasn't quite right when next to the fabric it was to go with. Oh and I'm grateful that more or less whenever I settle down in front of the TV to watch some tennis while I'm hemming or elasticating or something Monfils has just started a match! I've hardly seen anyone else this tournament so far...well, that I've heard of that is! He's out now which is a shame as he's such an entertaining player to watch but it does mean I can get back to the sewing machine, the washing machine, the cooker...

For time out with a hasty tasty salad and sunshine in the communal gardens when they weren't being too frantically communal at the time...that I found the book I wanted to take down with me but which had disappeared (remembered I'd carried it back last time inside the folded canvas chair...and that I've had a Facebook friend request from the food bank that I was trying to convince should have a page months ago and has at last just created one.

Massive thanks that the second replacement key for the storage room lock arrived in the post today, fitted the lock and unlocked it! Also for a free sample of a laundry product I'd not found in the immediate vicinity to encourage me to go a little further afield if I like it, I guess. And I'm grateful that Ann has been inspired in her decorating...get Pat to show you her 'muriels'!

Bright

This morning I've had 'The One' going round in my head...the one by Gabz on Britain's Got Talent! I've really enjoyed seeing how the 12-16s have featured on the show this year. It can be such a creative time in life, that little gap between childhood and adulthood, especially if your talents and aspirations are respected and nurtured just as part of you, not treated as a disgrace if they're different from your parents' or peers' or overblown as a vociferous claim to fame. Those years weren't a very happy time for me but I'm grateful for the memories of music I wrote, the songs and poems, the clothes I designed and made, the artwork and so on...Oh, and the sense of possibility...

I'm grateful for another excellent acupuncture session...we've been trying a slightly different regime the last few weeks and until it's broke we won't be fixing it! The treatment rooms are upstairs from a shop full of almost irresistible goodies...baubles and beads candles and cards and things to decorate your body and home...so I'm always thankful when I manage to come out of there able to appreciate the experience without the need to own the bits and bobs that make it!

I'm grateful that I had a cuppa on the blowy seafront afterwards though I didn't feel like lingering long, lovely to see all the visitors enjoying it but it was hazy and unphotogenic (I can relate to that!) and I thought you might like to see these pretty (wall) flowers I passed on the way instead...

Gratitude for my tea cooking and nearly done, for the colour combinations as smoky grey blue clouds gathered over the greeny blue sea behind the limey green leaves...and my new washing up bowl which is orange. The future of washing up is bright now too!

I must go down to the sea again

After lugging camera and binoculars down to the seafront today I completely forgot to use either...duh! But though I was distracted by medical chores and various things to buy and do, I didn't forget to appreciate the hard glitter sparkle of the sea (as I routed myself within sight of it as often as I could)... just to take a photo to share! I'll have to go back again won't I?

Whatever Mr Masefield's experience it certainly wasn't lonely with all those people making holidays but I took a break and a sit down as often as I could as well, and was grateful to share sunny benches with some friendly folk. Also that the lady who had her skirt rucked up under her bag was so pleased when I told her. You never know which way surprise and embarrassment might affect a response in that situation but we ended up laughing so much the rest of the interminable Post Office queue looked round indignantly as if to say 'this isn't supposed to be fun you know!'

Gratitude too for remembering to pick up a bunch of summer timetables from the Tourist Information Office. While I was looking at the rack a man came in and asked the staff for a No 2 bus one...'They're behind you,' they said and when he turned round behind him was me holding one out to him..'And an 11?' He said turning back to the counter...'They're there too,' he was told...and sure enough I was holding out one of those too by the time he looked back! More chuckling and banter... As ever I give thanks I live somewhere where people do!

I was grateful for a bit of tennis to watch when I got home, a bit of sewing, a bit of tidying up and a bit of a snooze. I'm ready for more snooze now but I must find a spot of supper first and I'm very grateful there's something in the fridge I can just put in the oven for that. I see the boat trip I've been longing to make has just started for the season again. Fingers crossed for this year eh?

It's raining in Paris

It used to mean your petticoat was showing, but today I'm using it in the sense of...it's raining in Paris! Il pleut, le soleil ne brille pas...that sort of thing. I wasn't at all grateful about it at first as I was a little too vigorous with the sorting out yesterday evening when a little window of 'Hey, I feel up to getting up and doing something right now' opened up, and felt that operating the remote control would be quite enough exercise for a few hours today so live tennis would have been just the thing... But never mind, it meant I got to see the last set of Monday's Monfils match which I hadn't been able to before...because I couldn't bear to see him lose after doing so well at the start of the match. Although usually I prefer not to find out the outcome in advance, I was very grateful for hearing he had won and I could safely watch the replay!

I'm extremely grateful the replacement key store room was finally persuaded to lock the door last night but it has no intention of opening it again today so the things I've sorted out to take down there have had to come back up to loiter about the kitchen. The bit when I feel gratitude for this is, as yet, obscured from view...as is a lot of the kitchen!

I give thanks that I thrive on tidy though...or I wouldn't be tacking the 3D slide puzzle of re-organising storage, and indeed what's stored, and as an intermittent task it fits well into the pace yourself/push yourself approach I'm advised to take to activity. Also great that the weather's so conducive to being indoors, and that I have a big deep bath and unmetered water - it's a mucky chore!

Gratitude for another easy tea...with leftover ready made stirfry enhanced with more veg, garlic, ginger and quorn. Mmm...crunchy...I give thanks for subtitles too!

The wood and the trees

I gave thanks last night for another moon mooning at me over the trees and sea...less round and orange than the night before but still rather lovely to see. And for getting the washing up done before I went to bed. It's not that I mind if I don't do it, but I love it when I do and there's a clean kitchen to start the next day! It's easy to beat yourself up about things, especially if you've been led to believe you are failing to achieve what you should and it was moving to watch a 'help for hoarders' programme yesterday evening when one of the clients was reminded about this. Most of us do better when we're accepted, if not praised, or at least not put down or punished, so as there's rarely a shortage of folk willing to do the latter two, try and tend towards the former whenever you can. When I'm really running short of things to pat myself on the back about there's always the fact that I'm neither a hoarder (nor a serial killer!) which the pocket psychology of TV programmes suggests might have been unsurprising developments in my life.

Much gratitude that the French Open started yesterday with plenty of coverage on TV...any opportunity to feel as if  I'm joining in something, especially on a Bank Holiday weekend, gratefully received! Also for a very welcome visitor...a Tesco delivery driver bringing lots of things to eat! You might think my life is rather sad that TV and Tesco are points to be grateful for, and you would be right, but it would be much sadder if either I didn't have access to these things...or I failed to appreciate them!

I'm grateful too for some of the photos of the trees in the wood on the old castle where the bluebells were...such pretty light on leaves in this one!

Unpick and mix

Yesterday evening I gave thanks for the lethargy busting sight of a big orange moon rising above the trees to silver the sea, very prettily demonstrating the power of illusion to enthral! Did encourage me to move from the horizontal though, and speedily too, which little has done since I arrived back home.

I was very grateful to all my neighbours for their quietness during the night and that all I heard this morning were birdsong, church bells and the drummer - none of which I mind listening to at all...especially lounging around in bed! I'd intended to get stuck into some sewing but it was one of those days when things get stuck, or come unstuck and I was grateful when fatigue made me give up before I was unpicking more than I'd stitched, and while there was a little bit of energy left to still get some laundry, catering and so on sorted... I was particularly thankful for taking some recycling down to the communal bins so I realised how warm the sunshine was and knew it was worth the effort of coming back up for a chair, a book and an apple..and that I hadn't been invited to the barbecue with the argumentative guests!

Risky business

Today I gave thanks that...for a Bank Holiday Saturday... my journey today was not too stressful. Likewise my homecoming as there had been some things going on around and about here that I'd been concerned about coming home to! I'm so glad I kidded myself I must buy something from the fruit and veg shop, not only as it's right by the taxi rank, but because then I had a nice chatty welcome from the staff there as well as from the cab driver. Grateful too for an unmolested package of fabric and haberdashery that was quite as delightful as I'd hoped...it's always a gamble internet shopping for those...and for something very mysterious that turned out to be a £10 M&S voucher for taking part in a urostomy bag product testing a while back. I'd agreed to this slightly risky business to be useful to one and all, and no mention of any gift in exchange had ever been made, but thank you...don't mind if I do!

I give thanks that one or two of the bluebell pictures we took on Thursday turned out OK...it was sooo blowy and they would not keep still...

I'm grateful for a cake swap with Peter that means I left with a chunky slice of a sultana one his cousin made while he had the last couple of chocolate fruity buns. I've not had much of an appetite today but that went nicely with a cup of tea! Also for the loan of a little yoga book I found fallen and long forgotten down the back of a shelf that could be ideal for swapping notes with the physio and saves me having to hunt charity shops for one. Much gratitude too for an excellent episode of Street Crew with teachers and admin staff putting on a routine for their pupils and colleagues at the end of term assembly - a very risky business indeed where any kind of credibility is concerned let alone street cred, but they did so well and it went down so well... uplifting for all concerned, including me!

Trains and boats and planes

I give thanks that the second train on my journey to Peter's was less stressful that the first...and for a trip to the bluebelliest place I think I've ever been after arriving...

For fish pie for tea and a trip to the Fleet Air Arm Museum today where we saw lots of planes, pretended to ride on helicopters, tour a working aircraft carrier and so on... the kind of thing I haven't done since Bob was a boy and somewhat missed I must say

For my first sight of a beautiful Fairey Delta and on the way back a field full of buttercups and fairy cows. For jacket potatoes cooking for supper...

The Social Network

So...continuing my homeopathic approach to the neighbourly dis-ease, last night I decided to watch The Social Network during the comings and goings of the evening. And I'm very grateful I did, enjoying it far more than expectations given that I knew a lot of the story and had seen some clips as well. Always particular joy for me in seeing the interactionally inept portrayed not as total failures of course...

I'm grateful for another couple of levels completed of Moral Dilemmas Are Us. This is not a phone or Facebook game and I'm morally bound to write the 'are' properly! I strive for right words and right actions or even right inactivity if that truly seems right but it's so easy just to sit on the high ground (as we all do!) casting aspersions and stones and worse at everyone we perceive as below. Of course I've wrestled with conundrums before...I should hope all of us do sometimes rather than always assuming our first thought, someone else's thought or even no thought is fine...and of course I'm aware that it's our own process of consideration that's important for our own development and learning rather than any ensuing outcome of our infinitesimal role...but I've never had quite so many and varied tests set at once. I feel like I'm in the midst of O Levels, GCSE's, Baccalaureate...whatever you can relate to as an analogy!

Anyway...I'm grateful too for getting the utensils and ingredients out early in the evening to make some little buns so that despite my deep exhaustion later it seemed sacrilegious to put them away again without putting them to use. Thanks for the buns too - chocolatey and fruity, and my lovely mug...this one not my face! Also for the sight of now full leaves silhouetted against the darkening sky, and the way the orange glow of lit windows, coming in and out of view as the lower branches moved in the wind, looked rather like flickering fires.

Much gratitude too for getting most of this gratitude written last night to save me time today!

Having a ball

Mmm, I give thanks for apple crumble and Crabbie's ginger beer for supper...that the relaxed me nicely! A 330ml bottle of the latter will keep me going for a week (well, months really as I don't open one every week) so I don't think we need to worry about my alcohol consumption. I thought it would take the edge off the stress of listening to other people's, though actually they didn't come home til 3 am so I had a nice earplug free sleep instead...and I know the time because they were telling their dog to not to bark on account of it! I give thanks for their consideration...

Around me, as there are in everyone's surroundings, some folk I feel drawn to and those I don't and I'm grateful for the lesson in compassion remembering that they are all worthy of it. Everyone has a right to be...even those you wish weren't being right here, right now! At a time in my life when there are just as many people I do feel drawn to, who I wish were here and aren't, it's a meaty psychological/spiritual challenge getting my head and heart around it and I do give thanks for that...even though sometimes I wish I could confer with a classmate or have a recess from my particular school of life for a week or two...

I had planned a restful restorative day of light creativity and snuggly snoozes but others had other plans for me so I could but go with their more vigorous flow...only managing to shut my eyes in time to fall asleep for a miniature nap while my ready meal tea got ready but I was very grateful for both of those and must hurry off to do the latter justice...

I'm grateful to the neuro physio Lucy who, after a surprisingly exhausting assessment, decided some strength building exercises could help my body but that my mind might prefer some yoga style ones. I also gave surprised thanks when I dropped a little round tub at the foot of my bed and it rolled underneath and then curved between the things stored there to emerge on one side at the top in an easily accessible place. Bet I couldn't have done that trick if I tried!

Oh, yes...and although this was neither lost nor forgotten it's not been in sight for a while so I give thanks for remembering how mesmerising it can be...though they make your mobile go weird if you get too near so not the easiest thing to take photos of!

Things come apart

Well, yes, they have a tendency to do so anyway but they way for which I'm giving thanks today is this...
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/12/disassembled-tech-things-come-apart_n_3246170.html

Also for the World's Weirdest Weather series which shows how amazingly they come together sometimes!

Today I was grateful to use my new clothes airer for the first time. It's rather smaller than the old one which is not altogether a bad thing as I can see out of the windows better over the top. It's a bit lighter to manoeuvre too! I've done enough other 'heavy stuff' the last couple of days as I've started reorganising where and how things are stored about the place. This will take a long time as it's like one of those slide puzzles requiring spatial ingenuity plus, to spare my fatigue and load bearing joints from too much load bearing injury, there's a limit to how many moves can be made in a day and whether the pieces can be moved all in one piece. I'm grateful for the optimistic beginning and the progress made, as I derive some satisfaction and, peace of mind from organisation and tidiness though this does mean that there have to be halfway houses for things so the place doesn't seem too chaotic between onslaughts.

I'm particularly grateful I've stopped for today though there is just one more thing I must do...I keep passing a piece of detritus in the hallway thinking it was a piece of packing material or sewing material. However I've just realised it's actually part of a poppadum. As I've not had curry for a couple of days this really somewhat disturbing...

Lilac time

Gratitude for the pretty skies last night and for having windows showing different views of them...a pinky orange tie dye effect on one side and a lilac marbled one on the other. Also when I unpacked my shopping from Saturday realising the colour theme in the clothes I'd bought. I hadn't spotted this before as I bought them in different places at different times and both were of the random 'Ooh I like that...and it might fit!' variety rather than sought ought garments. Also remembered I'd forgotten to mention being grateful for some miniature besuited buskers on Saturday belting out sixties and seventies 'boy band' songs and a man taking his snake for a trip along the promenade!

Gratitude for getting home after a rather tedious day...though the bus that goes to the local hospital does pass some parts of town that made me give thanks that I don't live there! Also thanks for finding a clothes airer to replace the one that doesn't want the job any more, at a price I could afford and close enough to the taxi rank to carry. Mwahahaha...it shall blight my life no longer! Though I've still got to get it the place where old clothes horses go to rest I suppose.  Gratitude for mostly laughing off the prank message on my answering machine from someone saying they were going to come round and kill me. Well, the bit that assumed it was a prank was chuckling I guess... And for sitting down to finish my post with a much needed cuppa in my new, impossible to resist £1.99 mug and...realising it's lilac and flowery!

Pocketing the difference

Last night I gave thanks that there was no neighbourhood noise that earplugs couldn't filter out and that mostly they stayed in! And this morning for the cooler greyer weather...I'd have needed not only a car to go out today but a piggy back to and from it too! It wasn't mad hot yesterday but it was too inviting not to sit out in and as also this week I saw my first dragonfly and hirundine of the year it really felt like summer was starting (a swift I think - only glimpsed from a car window, and yes, I've learnt a new word!) I read this week that 'they have proved' it's not just vitamin D we get from sunshine. God bless them, eh? Those people who like to prove things! And yes that is my idea of a joke!

In fact being grateful for the weather was pretty much all I did before noon. I gave a moral dilemma a bit of a hug instead of a wrestle, a financial concern an abundance of whatever instead of worry, and great thanks I had nothing more urgent to do. There was a rumour I might have a visitor this afternoon but you shouldn't be fooled by those, and in a way I was grateful not as I had to catch up with domestic tasks after yesterday's micro break. I was delighted to get a little more sewing done on that tricksy top too...with a little less unpicking this time! Though I think I might undo the side seams and put some pockets in...there's never anywhere to put a tissue in the summer is there?

Constant waving

It's been a very trying, tiring week for me...I'm sure I could easily list fifteen things for which I'm not grateful at all! And on a sunny Saturday sometimes I especially wish I had more chums to be chummy with, or more loved ones just to love...or, in lieu of these, the wherewithal to go somewhere away from the rest of humanity, to mountains and moors and wilder places again and be with the me I like the best...

However, by forgetting the 'pace yourself' advice and pushing myself to my limits I can have this and it is far from a small mercy...it is a wide blue yonder of blissfulness! Seriously I could ride the ferry back and forth for hours but they only do a one way ticket and it would get rather costly...

I give thanks for getting here today and having here to get to! For finding a new shop of delectable deli-ishness across the river, though I couldn't actually shop there today and have an afternoon out as well, so I'll have to back another time I guess (sometimes I crave a car as well....to carry things in, as well as me!) For a few good charity shop finds back on this side including a garment that didn't need altering and a big fat Anita Shreve for 99p! For the warmth of the weather so lots of rests could be taken to help me on my way...some of which even out of earshot of screaming children and moaning grown ups... For finding forgotten leftovers in the fridge on my return so I didn't have to cook tea. Oh, and for winning a long battle with my laptop and my ever unco-operative fingers to tell you about it too!

Top and bottom

This morning I gave thanks for all the washing up there was as surely it must mean less cooking to be done? Last night in my post-acupuncture period of relative vigour I decided to prepare the veggie lentil stew ready for slow cooking today...but then I left the pan on so I had fast cooked slightly burnt stew for tea then and there instead. I kept wondering what the funny smell was and thought perhaps it was me...so I was very glad it wasn't! Oh and of course I gave thanks for the cloggy pan bottom to scrub...excellent for bingo wings! Actually I was very grateful for remembering my top tip for burnt pans which is to boil a mixture of water and a little clothes washing powder in them for a minute or two. Trust me this loosens the gunk up a treat!

I'm grateful to Lynn for sending me a very funny email, and that I won another skirmish with my folding airer. It's not in the first flush of youth...you could legally marry it if you were of a mind to...and it's better at collapsing than standing tall these days, which I'm not in a position to criticise really, but it brings out my competitive side. The finish is cracking and falling off too, but it would be a challenge to get a new one home so it knows it has me over a barrel. Well, not literally...couldn't get a barrel home either, could I?

I fought with some pieces of fabric that are not keen to be a top today too and gave thanks for a little progress. My first instinct on seeing the pattern was to wonder how it could be sewn and now I know it can't be unless your name is Dynamo or Derren! I did finish this one off eventually though...delays there due to being unable to see straight to sew straight rather than design flaws, so much gratitude for a siesta and a meditate to restore me enough for the final push. I'm grateful all I need now is to push something into the oven to heat...and maybe push a few buttons on the remote control before an early night...

Brainwaves

This morning, exhausted from all that 'help with shopping' yesterday, I'm back embroiled in the usual what can I do v what do I want to do v what would improve my quality of life if I did conundrum. I'm grateful to the sunshine for providing that extra factor to be considered! Sunshine plus prescriptions to collect does suggest a hobble down the seafront (the hobbling part not optional today unfortunately!) I could get veg on the way to the taxi back up the hill but there's nowhere to get eco soap powder within a few steps of that and there'll only be a few steps left. Brainwave! Don't do any more washing than you have soap powder for over the next few days...sorted!

Biggest thanks of the day so far (11am) is seeing Hothead Von on cancerchat again. I don't visit there often any more...far too much chatting about cancer for my tastes... but Von was someone I missed and feared I wouldn't hear of again. I'm always grateful to her for her idea of there being a Dance for Life, like the race but including people who could only dance sitting down, or lying down, maybe just with their eyelids! And for the wonderful idea of starting a communal poem... Great to hear that Paper Roses Deb is still hanging on in there too!

This afternoon I was grateful when the sun went in as I couldn't find my mojo and can't leave home wihout it! I still have to go out for admirable acupuncture, virtuous veg and those pesky prescriptions but waving my brain at the sea might have been a beach too far anyhow...

...and in retrospect this evening I realise rather too nippy in reality today as well. I give thanks for discovering sweet pepper oatcakes and realising how extra delicious they'd be with cream cheese on top...and for having cream cheese in the fridge to prove it as well! There's been a lot of smiling through gritted teeth the last few hours - good to have something yummy to get them into instead!

All in

I forgot to say about the wool yesterday... I've started saving snippings again when I'm finishing off jumpers or trimming seams. When I had my market stall (and there were so many!) I used to make a cotton 'cushion cover' out of a bit of old sheet or something to collect them in and when it was full I'd sew it up and put a pretty cover on top. I'm not producing them at such a rate now but last week I sent Jan, who has just acquired a felting machine, a bag of bits to play with and she made a lovely little piece of felt with leftovers from my lovely chunky zigzaggy jumper. This pleased us both very much indeed!

Gratitude for the howling of the wind last night...and for neighbours being quiet enough to hear it! To Laura for doing a spot of chauffeuring for me so I could get to various places not very far away but more than I could manage otherwise all in one day...and now, as I'm as tired as if I actually made the journey on foot, for leftovers cooking in the cooker and horizontalness on the horizon as soon as soon can be...

I gave thanks for this article about ladies of advancing years not letting themselves go...http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-22013245

and this mentioning something they could do if they did! http://www.shropshirestar.com/news/2013/05/14/contest-entry-for-alexs-shipshape-shed/

Raisins to be cheerful

Thirty four years ago today my son was born and I give thanks that he's turned out so well...by my standards anyway! I know I didn't turn out well by my own family's standards and I was often told what a pig's ear I was making of motherhood, but I think he's quite a silk purse actually, in an alternative upcycled sort of way. It amuses me when straighter sorts hint that his dreads are dreadful given the grief I've been given for my own unruly hair over the years. 'Speaking as a social anthropologist' (a phrase much bandied about when I was dabbling in the necessary degree) I understand the conventional cultural nuances regarding 'untamed' and 'unconventional' hair and am grateful I can muster some compassion when confronted by this accumulated prejudice and bigotry.

Today a physiotherapist came to see me about my neurological damage...it's not a situation when 'better late than never' is technically accurate but I gave thanks that the physio I saw about my arthritis thought it/I was still worth it. And that his colleague was a guitar playing hill walking woman who thus really could comprehend and feel sorry for my loss!

I give thanks for a lovely omelette for my lea with potatoes, onions, mushrooms, pepper and cheese and a nice bit of salad on the side... And for knowing Carole Arab...though I do miss her having known her, if you know what I mean. For an episode of Coast with the Cuillins in (sigh) and a view of the local rail line(smile).

So where do the raisins come in? Part stew rhubarb with a little water and some big juicy Lexia or flame raisins. Leave it to stand for a few hours stirring now and then, and the sweetness comes out of the raisins and the rhubarby water plumps them up. You shouldn't need any sugar, but if it's a little tart and you're making a little crumble (couldn't resist!) add some snippets of marzipan to the fruit mixture. You will not be able to resist the finished article...you will be cheerful indeed!

Top top

Yay, the neighbours have gone out...I give thanks for being able to hear myself think! I try to  have compassionate thoughts towards them but it is much easier when they're not there. What to do with the luxury of 'silence'? I think I'll just listen to the wind for a while, and watch the swirling leaves...if I can keep my eyes open! I'm always grateful for my high up windows and view of weather effects...

Mmm...Now I can give thanks for a lovely half hour's meditate, resting my body and my mind... And that I don't have to leap into any kind of action again straight away.

I give thanks that I half cooked my dinner in the more bustly part of the day, and did some cleaning and household chores without undue pain or total exhaustion. Much thanks too that when I had to sit down in between I was able to finish sewing the top of this top. I think the binding I won in the ebay auction goes rather well with the broiderie anglaise and it made it easier to attach the muslin lining too...so I'm very grateful for that. Thanks too that the weather is still far too chilly to wear it so I can leave the rest for now and do some chilling instead!

Deep clean

Some days gratitude seems more elusive than others...I'm sure you can relate to that! Of course, it's a sure sign we're taking things for granted, not being appreciative enough and generally thinking in unhelpful ways...

So today, cleaning the bathroom bit by bit throughout the afternoon, I decided to focus on what I could find to give thanks for in the task. Having a bathroom was obviously a good place to start, having the strength and skills to clean it...and the motivation! Though it's verging on smug, also for how prettily and well designed it is given the tiny and unpromising space I started out with...for the wherewithal to buy the materials and to pay people for the tasks in the process I couldn't do.

For being able to do today's work gradually at my own pace...with no one nagging, getting in the way or messing it up in the meantime. For cleaning materials and remembering to save old toothbrushes. For hot and cold running water, an awareness of where dirt lurks and perseverance...and how much better it looks when it's clean!

Take a seat

Much gratitude for earplugs again last night...and for not being a junkie without my stuff - for deeply do they suffer... I was grateful that despite disturbances I rose in time to get some packages to the Post Office...and managed not to burst into to tears when the counter clerk said how much they'd be because it really was a horrible shock! Being up early(ish) also meant that I was near the phone when Laura rang and thus able to say yes to helping her take two dogs for a walk...always the kind of thing I'm happy to help with - as long as there are plenty of seats to rest on along the way! I was grateful to relieve Luders of a couple of slices of special offer fruit cake for that very purpose and to say 'thank you' for thinking of me...

Afterwards we stopped at a second hand furniture shop that's not long been there very long and that's in a place easy to spot but not to stop. It turned out to be far better than we expected with some interesting items for sale at quite reasonable prices including this stool/table/plant stand thingy which is the right height, size and strength to be any of the above and was, by virtue of this versatility, the five pound price tag and the car to bring it home in, a bargain I couldn't resist!

This afternoon I've been predictably sedentary, though not on the stool! I'm grateful I've not actually fallen asleep yet but have been doing a bit more slowmo sewing and catching up with catch up TV. Well, that is what it's there for, eh? I give thanks for the aroma of jacket potato calling me to me tea...

Stay stitching

Today I've been grateful for drizzly weather to go with my dozy self...and for being dozy, at least in part, for an at least partly pleasant day yesterday, even though it was partly drizzly!

I gave thanks for the hospital staff being so friendly and a soothing ride into the city beside a grey sea with a myriad of low white topped waves...Also to Peter for driving me up to the woods to look for bluebells not too grudgingly! Even though we didn't find a woodland carpet of them we saw a quite a few, plus a bank covered in primroses and campion and violets too...before a flask of tea and those yummy pastries by the reservoir surrounded by all the spring greens and magenta mounds of rhododendrons too...

I'm grateful to the tapas bar for still providing such delicious food in such a relaxing ambience...it must be a year or so since I've been there and Peter never had at all but could soon see why I was so keen! He seemed pretty grateful for his birthday treat...

Today I had to get up much earlier than I would have preferred to wait for a delivery of stuff I would really rather not have to have at all...but I'm grateful really I suppose, and in between the various chores, and the very necessary idlenesses, I've done a little work on a sewing pattern adaptation...and even some sewing of it too! I certainly give thanks for any of my many projects progressing, as they're not just hobbies but providing me with clothes comfy to put on and wear...whilst hopefully meeting my aesthetic needs as far as limitations allow. I've got to a bit where the iron needs to come out though...always a good place to take a break I find! As I've gratefully just discovered the left over filling mix and pastry in the fridge I think it'll be a snack break...

Between the rows

Mmm, a night warm enough to have the window open listening to the waves...what a treat is that? And much thanks for the sound of birdsong this morning...very good for you, you know, as this article will explain...
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-22298779
Also for some cosy covers to pull up and a heater to put on before I got up ...bit of a nip in the air again!

The bickering went on and escalated last night and in the end one of the parties called the police which is a relief as I really don't like the rows, the verbal violence and sometimes physical too, I've overheard over the years. But I must admit I rather enjoy the different sort drama when the officers come... and a sense of increased safety too. I don't know if it's to do with the signal on their radios, or procedural, but they always call in to base from the landing outside the flat where it all goes on (which of course is right outside my front door) and it makes quite fascinating listening, though I do try not to actually draw up a chair and ghoulishly take in all the details...

I'm grateful I've completed my pre-renal appointment challenges which are of the jumping through a hoop on a wooden leg variety. Actually that describes what most of life feels like when your kidney function falls...

I give thanks that Peter has confirmed he is picking me up afterwards...and that I've completed the challenge I set myself of making some little pastries with feta, peppers, spinach and olives to share with a cuppa outdoors somewhere... All I've got to do now is remember to take them...and to get washed and dressed before I leave!

The picture? Oh that's nothing to do with anything apart from that I'm grateful I was there the other day and thought to take it, and thought you might like to look at it too... It also makes a pun...and I like those!

The rain on the pane

Well, twelve hours in bed (most of them asleep!) and I was still tired...Never mind, I was grateful for the twelve hours! And lying there with my cup of tea listening to the people upstairs bicker I was very thankful I don't have to share my life (apart from me earshot!) with anyone who doesn't share my love of harmony! True, there have been many who have thought me most unharmonious and have urgently wanted me elsewhere, and that has made me sad...but I'd rather be sad and harmoniously alone with myself than with people who'd rather I wasn't around - or even vice versa! I'm aware that the bickerers might actually prefer things that way, that they might be grateful for being with others who like fussing and fighting...and I do hope that is the case!

I'm grateful too for not nagging myself and staying snoozing soothingly with a book well into the afternoon, loving the light patter of the rain on the window and the sound of the breeze sighing in the leaves... until I finally felt like moving and got dressed and finished vacuuming the kitchen floor and then, for some random reason, decided to start on the stairs. I live in a flat where there's plenty of stairs outside my door so, though I was delighted with the results, I was very grateful when the extension lead ran out and I couldn't go all the way to the bottom! I do have a longer one somewhere but I couldn't find it, which I think given the weight of a Henry and my general feebleness, is actually a blessing! What goes down, in this case, must come up!

I give thanks for finally sewing the hems on those truculent trousers...just by hand, in case they need adjusting after further cake consumption...or laundering perhaps... These things done, making tea and washing up and I'm pretty much washed up again myself. I give thanks for the window of opportunity for activity in my day...

Cake tales

What a wonderful thing the unconscious is...I give thanks for happy dreams last night! Also for earplugs for muffling the sounds of those nearby who were conscious at the time...

Gratitude for the late sun yesterday whisping away the cloud...and a bonfire crackling in the gardens below. Quite autumnal really! Thanks too for an episode of Secret Street Crew with a lady even older than me among the dancers, and Ashley describing a church fete to someone who didn't know the phrase as 'Sells cake...and there's ribbons and old people...'

Speaking of which, I give thanks for enjoying a spot of sun, sea and cake myself this afternoon after calling in at the doctor's...and for making some soup from odds and ends of veg as, apart from this, I've not felt much like eating today and soup usually slips down a treat when your appetite has slipped away.

Great gratitude too for finally (I think!) getting the hem right on the linen trousers I'm making. Every time I've tried them on they seem to have got longer...well, either that or my legs have shrunk...and eating cake makes you grow taller, not shrink...in Alice in Wonderland anyway!

Let's twist again

Gratitude for last night's serendipitous collection of leftovers that turned into a tasty one pot tea. What love and time doesn't seem to mend, garlic often makes taste better!

For another aimless day...If you've forgotten what the aim is, or fail to achieve what you thought it was, embrace what is anyway. Afterall, what is is what you've got...

For finding an unusual phone game (no explosions, nothing to capture!) called Blendoku which is kind of like organising colour charts...Useful for times when you have no paint to watch dry, I guess, and rather soothing and satisfying when each arrangement is made... It's by a company called Lonely Few and their logo features an outline drawing of one person sitting on a sofa big enough for three or four. I kind of like that too!

I give thanks for all the interaction I overhear from here, that people are having a busy sociable weekend and enjoying it by the sounds of it. Even the wood pigeons were having a party early on! I give thanks for the increasing murkiness of the day so there's less of a sense of missing out, for the sharp green of new leaves against the grey too...

I'm struggling with my craft projects at the moment...both in the sense of finding the energy after essentials are done, and also because a couple of them are going through a truculent phase and need less mental limpness than I can offer just now too...so I decided to make a couple of scrunchies to tie up my bonny brown hair (or whatever) to have a little completion in my life! One fabric was left over when altering a dress, and the other salvaged from a top that died so pleasing from the waste not want not point of view too...

Gardening leave

I give thanks for the all the opportunities to do nothing since my last post! For a half price Hobbit from Sky to keep me company yesterday evening. For three good books on the go...one of which I took down to the gardens to read in a folding chair this afternoon before realising I couldn't keep my eyes open and I'd have to come back up for a sleep! For the lilac flowers opening...and blowing around far too much in the breeze to be photographed so I don't have to upload a picture but can hurry back to the important activity of avoiding it as much as possible...

For two seeds thrusting up little sprouts in the trays I planted...

Sweet success

It's not often I get to do something I really want to so I give thanks for a trip to the pictures last night. Shame the 'comedy' film was so unfunny but we did have a laugh when Peter (who is used to me handing him unwrapped ones in the car) popped a cellophane covered Werther's straight into his mouth. I was grateful to him for picking me up at the station and even giving me a lift home afterwards. That was very welcome as I was so tired, as was the stew I'd prepared earlier (as they say) which was waiting for our supper! I give thanks that Peter loves red lentils and rice cakes as much as I do as any opportunity to feel less odd's a bonus...

My lack of mobility (social and otherwise) means I'm usually extra isolated at Bank Holidays which can be rather sad,  so I give thanks that I planned ahead and got myself a new Ruth Rendell from the library and an 'indulgent' chocolate cake so that solitary confinement feels more like a treat...

Gratitude for the glorious spring greens as different leaves begin to open everywhere...and the blossming blossom too! Such a change in the last week and, though I haven't been far, as I've been on the road and the railway and on foot I've seen a selection of views.

Great thanks for my tea of jacket potato, cottage cheese and salad. Intrinsically tasty, but also because my natural inclination to eat quite wholesome food means chocolate cake cravings can be indulged!

Wave bye bye

Don't fret, I've not jumped out the window...it's just the time of year when, from the living room, the sea begins to disappear behind the leaves and I always feel a little wistful...until I remember it usually means the weather is warming up too! In the autumn I get wistful when the leaves fall off and then remember that soon I will be able to see the sea... I give thanks for this regular reminder of the cycle of life...

Much gratitude for getting not only the mattress turned the other day but the wire mesh base sections swapped around so that I no longer feel like I'm in a trough or slithering down a slope...well, not regarding sleeping positions anyhow! I can't say I'm sleeping better but I'm lying more comfortably when I'm not...

I'm very grateful for realising that if you have flaky pastry and marzipan you pretty much have almond croissants...near enough for my taste buds anyhow!

Thanks that the deeply distressed (and vocal about it!) dog upstairs was reunited with their owner after an hour or two and they were apologetic when I mentioned it, and for the sight of three other dogs playing tag on the lawns later. I'm grateful it's not been so sunny though this morning or I might have been tempted to go out myself and this would have been unwise as I have to go out later this afternoon. It's a nice going out but will be no less tiring than a nasty one, just a whole lot more worthwhile...I hope!

I'm grateful I've made a pot of stew for supper and Saturday tea...

Sharing

Mmmm...quiet! I give thanks the people upstairs are either asleep or out so I can only hear the more distant neighbourly noises warm weather and sharing of locality brings and can have a little snoozzzzze now I'm back from town. Always ready for more of those these days... I'd rather be awake, but if I'm only fit for sleep then I'm grateful when the situation fits the need!

Dot dot dot...

I give thanks for another glorious spring afternoon. Particularly grateful for less breeze this time so it was warm on the seafront by the doctor's as I hadn't the energy after my appointment to go to the sun trap back beach again... For having a seafront doctor's!  For a typical local sight of a cormorant fishing a few feet from shore, a paddle boarder a few metres further out and not many more beyond that a pilot guided tanker navigating the shoals. Love the sharing of sea space!

I'm grateful for picking up a couple of not too heavy or awkward packages at the Post Office with odds and ends for sewing and knitting projects, for Rachel bringing me a courier one she'd accepted for me (how kind!) and a dress she'd bought in a charity shop that hadn't fitted her for me to try (ditto!)

Gratitude too to Stephanie for sharing these pictures http://www.boredpanda.com/4-sisters-take-photo-every-year-for-36-years/ and Sylvie these http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2316987/Photographer-Niki-Feijens-eerie-images-abandoned-farm-houses.html, both of which I enjoyed greatly!

I give thanks that, by means of patient instalments I've been able to share news of what I'm newly I'm thankful for. Will I be able to stay awake til tea's ready now? 'Til bed time? Aaah, who knows?

Mayday Mayday

This evening I'm grateful I've come to rest after a very busy day. For the shenanigans upstairs ceasing for sleep time and for having the opportunity to be a good neighbour in return and call for an ambulance this afternoon when one of them appeared to move from stupor to seizure and worried the others a while. I'm so grateful I'm not an alcoholic...it seems very hard work!

For a 'long walk'...well, by current standards anyhow! For the weather being so conducive as many sedentary pauses were required. For all the entertaining things I saw...like a little dog working out how to get to a seagull on the edge of a dinghy that was making it cross. It had a few goes at reaching it by boat (walking across the moored ones...what did you think I meant?) before giving up and walking round to a place where it could swim safely between them. This meant it could really surprise that gull as it was looking the other way quite unaware the attack was coming from below. One bark and the bird nearly fell in!

For living somewhere so beachily beautiful, and well appointed...always a place to be out of the breeze, and miles away from an amusement arcade!

For Laura coming to help me give my bed a bit of a spring clean. I mean what I say...we took the mattress off and the base and cleaned the frame and underneath...mmm, clean...I love clean! And for a book about Scottish isles she found in a charity shop and gave to me. I've been thinking a lot about Scottish isles of late so hopefully this will satisfy my urges for a while as they are mightily hard to get to without a set of wheels, sails or very strong legs!

I'm grateful I have lots of things to eat that require nothing more than heating up for tea, and some not even that like fresh fruit salad made yesterday and blueberried up this afternoon. I'm grateful for remote control and sofa, earplugs and a book and a plan to practice the business of not being busy for a while...