Well, as you know, I go through my day gathering bits of grateful... Sometimes it seems as if a theme or connection emerges and today, though grateful thoughts have been very sparse, the theme has been that I've not feeling truly thankful even when I've managed any at all. Every time I've remembered I've not had a grateful thought for some time and have tried to construct one there's been a thorn in any rosiness I've come up with...some buts... and some big buts sometimes.
I'm grateful I've tried to compose with some brittle wit or inspiring insight regarding this...er, but I've failed to do so. I'm grateful I've decided not to go through a rote list of stuff I should be grateful for, we should all be grateful for - our first world taken for granted luxuries - because I am...but saying it is still not quite feeling it.
I'm grateful for the awareness of fluctuating perceptions of stuff and situations. For the awareness that even the stuff we unswervingly think is unmitigatedly grim sometimes just has to be borne...sometimes all the time.
I'm grateful for the sound of bands playing on the back beach wafting up on the wind and reminding me of how it feels to feel you're having a good time. I'm grateful for playing a couple of Norman Cook tracks much too loud to remind people I think are much too loud much too much of the time not to forget how quiet I am. Not big or clever...but I do like a bit of Norman Cook so a bit kind to me.
I'm grateful for the relief of darkness falling, a hard day of the heart and mind drawing to a close. I'm grateful I can legitimately head off for a bath and bed very shortly as I've a very early start in the morning and whatever else tomorrow brings it sure as heck won't be like today!
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