Just one step

Someone suggested recently that maybe my kidney function was deteriorating due to something I was or wasn't doing...and I was like 'Oh, I wish! Wouldn't it be great to have a vital organ failing and have the power to stop it?' And then I watched Louis Theroux's documentary about desperate alcoholics and decided to give thanks that I don't have a vital organ failing and the power to stop it, but be unable to stop the thing that I'm doing that's making it happen. I give thanks for his thoughtfulness and tenderness with people and the way these programmes give viewers the chance to see feelings of loss, lack and lovelessness (plus fear of more of the same) are so often behind so many anxious addictive behaviours, including hoarding and gorging and the constant need for cleaning or companionship... I must admit I find it hard to be grateful for my generous share of the first group sometimes but I do give thanks I mostly avoid the latter...

I give thanks a man came and put a coat of stain sealant of the stains on the kitchen ceiling today. I give thanks he only had one knee on the top of my ladder when it broke...I'd been standing on the top of it to get things off the tip of the kitchen cupboards before he arrived so I'm very grateful it didn't break then either!

I give thanks for sorting out various prescription related confusions this afternoon and a heavy bag full of more items to go to a charity shop so I could book a cab to force me to go out and pick up the ones I could. I give thanks for it being warm enough to sit on the almost deserted beach in the sunshine with a take away cup of tea...and for watching a ship come in which is a cheap thrill that never fails to enthrall me. Looks like a dodgy bit of photoshop doesn't it? Or a nicely timed photo of course...