Cincuenta y ocho

Oh I say, a pretty good night's sleep! That's something to be grateful for! For the first time in ages I didn't even have to get up and pace around to ease the pain and though this did mean I was extra stiff and sore when I finally got up, on balance I'd say it was worth it.

I give thanks for finding out from the ward clerk I can have hospital transport for all really related appointments. I'd been fretting a little about having to be on site for 10 am on Thursday especially as the part of the site I needed to get to is quite a long walk from the bus stop. I was even more grateful however when an hour later one of the unit sisters came up with a message from the consultant that she had to cancel this time. Fine by me!

I give thanks for surviving grumbly drivers and a noisy treatment area. It was fairly cosy though so I was certainly grateful for that!

Cincuenta y siete

I give thanks for hurting less than I thought I might after yesterday - not much more than normal really though, despite a slightly better night, I'm about twenty times more tired! Despite the ever growing to do list, for not having to do anything urgent apart from look after my basic needs at a very leisurely pace...and being quite content with my lack of energy as it's the first time I've been exhausted by doing something nice for a very long time. It's a privilege and a luxury you know!

I give thanks for the bright and breezy weather for people out and about, the pastel sea after sun down. For part making some food for tomorrow when Rachel is due to come and, of course, lots of food for today! For a new to me quorn pie to try for tea as my appetite is outstripping my enthusiasm for culinary creation now, and for finally washing the clothes I had to strip off a few days ago when my lack of manual control got seriously out of hand.

Cincuenta y seis

Who pays the ferry man? We do, we do! I give great thanks, after grievously missing the big one that crosses the deep blue sea missed some weeks ago, that today I got to pootle about on little ones that serve a rather scenic city canal with Jan. I still wasn't sure up until 7 am today if I'd actually manage to do it - pain in the night making it seemingly impossible, but by getting up extra early for it to ease I was able to do the decent thing and honour our long standing agreement

I give thanks for the assistance I couldn't have done it without from through trains and my trusty fold up walking stick which I don't use for walking as much as for support when standing or trying to after sitting down! And for my true grit of course, by Jove I needed that...

I give thanks for the very great pleasure of Jan's company, for both finding perfect lunches very reasonably priced in the same laid back place, for lots to enjoy at a snail's pace and surprisingly mild and sometimes sunny weather to make a snail's pace (including lots of stopping for rests) more viable and pleasant. For brilliant busking drummers twitching our toes when we were flagging waiting for the ferry back to the station...and for psychic hedgehogs which I can't explain but which will spookily entertain us for as long as we both shall live!

Cincuenta y cinco

Mmm... I give thanks for filling a plain omelette with cream cheese and chopped chives last night, and serving with sliced new potatoes, leeks and peas. Highly recommended, though I don't recommend tipping the whole plate upside down and spilling everything on your lap, leggings, socks and living room carpet! There's a question in the PIP assessment about your ability to convey food (reliably) to your mouth...Mate, I can't convey anything reliably to anywhere, and just herd stuff hopefully in my chosen direction and see what transpires. What transpired in this was half a meal available, slightly fluffy and stone cold, after puzzling for some considerable time how to move at all without making the mess much worse. Ugh!

I give thanks for a bucket to soak clothes in, and enough clothes not to have to deal with it today. For dealing with today which, after another unspecified 'night' passed in a blur of fatigue and poorly concealed ill humour at the lack of peace and space and privacy which is normal for patients on the ward and obviously the way things have to be, but which I find very wearing sometimes. I give thanks I was so exhausted I managed to get a bit of sleep anyway - including in the taxi on the way to the hospital!

I give thanks though the last couple of days have largely been about damage limitation, I am cautiously optimistic that tomorrow, within my many limitations, I might try doing something for pleasure for a change.

Cincuenta y cuatro

For the bright crescent moon in the darkening pastel sky the previous two evenings, and for tonight's stay at home cosy murkiness.

I give thanks for Hippychick bedding that feels like flannelette but has a waterproof core. Usually when I've had cause to remember to give thanks for that I've been grateful for my washing machine too, but with mine out of action until a week on Saturday I was very grateful I was able to give thanks for Julie's instead... Also for her doing the lion's share of bed remaking as stripping it had been a touch traumatic to a still tender back.  I give thanks for a whole host of other helpfulness from her too, including enthusiasm for some dairy free biscuits found in the convenience store across the road.

I give thanks for trying to keep pottering about with odds and ends of chores myself despite little motivation or energy. For resolving to keep remembering there's not really such a thing as a bad night any more - there are just nights. Maybe if I do that they won't seem quite such hard going when they are going on...

Cincuenta y tres

Cincuenta y dos

When I've had a bad night I always give thanks if it's a day when I don't have to get up and ready for anything. Last night was particularly bad, so I was particularly grateful!

I give thanks for Bulb asking me to send them meter readings which seems to be a good sign I'm finally changing to a supplier of my choice. And for having the strength and motivation to go down the stairs and back to get the numbers for them.

I give thanks for Jenny inviting herself round for a cuppa in the afternoon, partly because it's always nice to see her but also because she offered to bring cake! And just after we'd arranged this I had notification a Boots order I'd clicked was ready to be collected and as she passed the shop on the way this worked out very well!

I give thanks for a late afternoon nap. Has to be done sometimes...and I was grateful for feeling a little more lively afterwards. I give thanks I've just heard from Julie that she is on the way after collecting some Tesco groceries I clicked earlier too. Lennon and McCartney wrote a song about something similar..