Day of the living

There've been a few opportunities in the last week to stretch myself physically and I'm grateful for those, as if one stays too much within a comfort zone one can find its boundaries shrink. The comfort zone of my body is encompassed by the tasks required to keep it and my home running but sometimes my spirit needs more than the carefully paced instalments in which this is normally carried out, and if physical ability is not to deteriorate further, it's important to literally keep as active as I can even if I can only do so for short periods of time...

I'm also grateful I now recognise the very specific symptoms of renal insufficiency fatigue...otherwise I might think there was something the matter with me! It's not like the flu, or 'normal' exhaustion following exertion, or convalescence...though it's similar to all three mixed up with a hefty dose of zombie thrown in. You'll have seen it in the movies, I'm sure...unseeing eyes and stumbling gait? Yep, classic signs of advanced kidney malfunction... The state of the clothes? Well, the associated neuropathies can make taking a pride in your appearance a burden. Of course I'm not personally craving human flesh yet...but anaemia and poor protein absorption could lead to that, you never know!


Watched a BBC3 programme made by UK young people very unhappy with their bodies, filming themselves and the treatments and procedures they go through to change their appearance. Very moving in several ways especially just after reading of a teenager almost dying of cold and malnutrition in the thirties...

I'm in grateful awe of the mystery of life for providing these random juxtapositions the better for me to contemplate the mystery of life... The Wikipedia page about my elder siblings' father followed by the programme made for care home kids, seeing film of my grandfather on my own father's birthday, a TV famous person I thought I used to know not writing back to me while one I correspond with has a programme dedicated to his infamy...and other serendipitous synchronicity I've mentioned here.

OK, I'd better get on with getting myself outdoors again. I really want to try walking down the hill today though it looks as if the wind direction may be against me...