Dialysis weeks seem much longer now I no longer have any personal space, but on the other hand I'm extra grateful when they end! I give thanks there were curtains up in the bay again which is a slight return to normality and, though they were open, meant there was one less person in the room in my line of sight. I give thanks for a nurse who feels the cold shutting the windows in the later afternoon, and when a new-to-me one took me off the machine and thought I might like to bond over some chat, I give thanks for trying hard to politely deflect her from this mission, despite much persistence on her part. In the end I tried honesty and explained I found the enforced interaction with people I haven't chosen to spend time with a very hard part of treatment and, when she responded other solitary shielding patients found it a joy, that yes, I do understand I'm odd! You don't seem shy she said, clearly oblivious to the very small gap between my jaws - look you're talking to me! Ah, extroverts they don't have a clue do they bless them!
I give thanks my taxi driver understands companionable silence. For seeing the sun setting as we made our way through heavy traffic, and the full moon following us on the other side of the sky.
I give thanks for cobbling together some tea. Usually I have some I prepared earlier but today I elected to sit on the beach earlier instead...and I'm very grateful I did!
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