Tuesday 29 June 2021

Paradoxical

I was grateful to wake up at 4 am today...as I'd gone to sleep at half past 9 - not a bad night by current standards. I was grateful for a trip to the loo in the middle too, as a dialysis patient who still needs to pee is a blessed soul indeed. 

I was grateful for Fargo to catch up with as I waited for 'bedtime' as I couldn't stomach the Murray match. How well I can relate to enjoying what remains of a skill one once had in greater abundance but to me it was painful to watch.

I give thanks for my latest bloods showing improvement slowing...as that's still better than getting worse. For feeling quite normal for good chunks of time...and for spending some of it making inroads into piles of unsorted paperwork uncharacteristically accumulated over the last year or so, having been mortified to find I couldn't find important stuff like my birth certificate the other day. Today's project was filing medical letters - never the jolliest task - so I give thanks for the great reward of finding the missing folder somehow concealed in the stack. Not only can being reminded of one's mortality encourage one to tidy up loose ends, but replacement documents are not cheap! 

For feeling proud of myself for 'making curry' (basically chopping a carrot and opening a pot of paste and tin of beans) and then savouring a cup-a-soup style food supplement the dietitians sent me so much I've not got round to eating it. 

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