Left and right

I'm grateful for having a jigsaw on the go so that after blogging yesterday I could sit and create some fragile temporary order in the chaos, and restore my mood a little. I was grateful to Rachel for driving over to give me acupuncture and food, and for making me a cup of tea as I sat at the puzzle so I felt extra nurtured too. I'm grateful Daryl had done most of the cooking so she could sit and put a few pieces together with me, a simple and soothing joint activity to accompany discussing the challenges we have surrounding needs left unmet, and trying to work out the right ways to proceed. 

I'm grateful a local radio was just that bit too loud to relax into my treatment, so I tried it with earplugs in and relaxed into it more than usual. 

I'm grateful for taking my earplugs out in the night to enjoy the quietness, while my unquiet body complained though gentle pushing of a Henry nozzle across a rug is permissible, vigorous and protracted wrestling with a broken one is not. For resolving to try to be less driven to try and fix the unfixable, to understand sometimes the right thing to do is to let everything be left to fall apart and fail. For thus resolving to attempt nothing today, even though of course I failed at that as well...

I'm grateful for the helpfulness of people in shops here and for someone I know a little from one stopping me in my grim determined laden trudge to offer me a hug. For taking a few minutes rest by the sea. For the neighbours becoming peaceful for a while after I got back. For receiving sad news when I was already sad...

I'm grateful for Tesco's Finest cauliflower cheese for tempting my jaded appetite, for my comforting quilt tempting me back to bed. I don't care if it's right or wrong... what's left of the day can do one!