I give thanks for the beauty of the route to the hospital, especially for all the trees there are to admire, some changing colour now. This morning I heard that the DWP have determined I have no mobility problems whatsoever and will be ceasing all related benefits, including my bus pass, so this to-ing and fro-ing for treatment may well be the only chance I get to see the countryside around here and I must learn to appreciate it more. I also give thanks that though the reduced funds and increased fares will hit me hard if I'm lucky enough to have a good day and want to go somewhere, the reality of the foreseeable future is that I wouldn't be able to get to a bus stop and climb aboard anyway. Alanis Morissette? Bless her, she had no idea at all really did she?
I give thanks for writing that earlier and then treating myself to a musical journey through my misspent middle age, flat on my back with my headphones on and little tears trickling down from the corners of my eyes. The last few weeks have left me a wizened and twisted old lady, losing hair and losing hope but somewhere inside there's a tiny bit of spirit left...so I gave thanks for remembering that.
I give thanks for the glorious weather, and managing a few minutes out in it waiting for the taxi to come. There didn't seem to be any breeze but for some reason some planes were flying low past my ward window on their way in to land, so I was grateful for that distraction in a rather trying session.
I give thanks for being home. There are so many hard things to come to terms with just now, just some space to deal with them quietly in my own way is very welcome. I have had a question running round my head since yesterday though, and I was very grateful for a phone call this morning from someone who could explain.
No comments:
Post a Comment