Hello again...how's it going with you?
I went out today for some odds and ends and also as I could hear the surf roaring and wanted to see it. It was 'messy' as the say, not 'clean' surfer surf but invigorating to sit in the sunshine a while and watch the breakers rolling in. Need invigorating at the moment...very limp!
This morning I stirred myself and called the secretary of the oncologist I've found out is dealing with my oncologist's caseload while she's away. And found she wasn't. She's dealing with some of her cases but by geographical area and I'm not in the right one. If I want an oncology appointment I have the choice of a) the man who, among other dangerous misdemeanours, failed to recognise and respond to my strokes on chemo even when my left hand became paralysed (That's nothing to do with me..you need to see a physiotherapist!) or b) the staff grade who said the enlarged lymph nodes that he had said were mets and meant no point in a cystectomy to remove the primary cancer probably weren't, refused to discuss it and said 'no further oncological input was required'. Now let me see...it's a tough decision but weighing up the possibilities I think... Um...I'll just not bother! It seems safer that way somehow. Rather die of the disease than at the hands of disinterested incompetents! I know at least one of you will respond suggesting I must do this, or that, or something else and if it's something I haven't thought of and tried maybe I will but I'm just so beeping tired of going round in ever decreasing circles with ever decreasing health and being so effing unsupported and messed around! I'm not an unreasonably demanding patient, neither am I a docile doormat but where to turn...and will it be just another waste of time and energy and hope?
Anyway...back to the happies. I'm grateful to Laura for giving me a lift back up the hill and helping with some diy chores. And I'm grateful to John and Jo for saying they'll come and help with some more this weekend. I'm grateful I have leftover stew if my appetite comes back and have made some sauce with good things in to 'mature' in the fridge for a pasta meal tomorrow... I'm grateful I have just enough energy left (I think) to do one more useful thing and that I've decided to get pjs on after so I can't do two and I'm grateful for heaters for it's a nippy old night over here
Angel, makes me want to come and collect you so you can live here in the Truro area for a while, and get some decent oncologist help. Some of these buggers need striking off. My GP has moved the skids under my oncologist since Wednesday, only thing that went tits up today was a telephone message via talk talk that I did not get until after office hrs, and the oncologists secretary had gone home for the weekend. Stay safe and take care Gabi, with all good wishes for the coming weekend. Pat xx
ReplyDeleteGood evening Angel,
ReplyDeleteWell i'm in no posistion to say "do this" or "do that" but I do know i'd feel like telling them all to go and 'do one!' how dare they treat you like this......don't they know how wonderful you are??? :)))
It's nippy up North tonight aswell, seen a status on fb yesterday saying the street gritters were out and about!! not a good sign,
Stay warm tonight Angel,
Goodnight Lynn x
Thanks both for your kind wishes...Pat, I'm all for positivity but I'm not sure how much 'better' things are down there if a decent oncologist sends you to a surgeon who takes out the wrong bit! Stay safe yourself!
ReplyDeleteAngel, though he did as you say, he took what he thought was the right bit, it just did not contain a 7mm cancer node, worse things happen at sea, the bloody ship sinks!
ReplyDeletePat xx